Self-hate-> is despising yourself and those who look like you. A lot of this is what causes the hatred of dark-skinned and African features. It’s like the big elephant in the room that people do not want to discuss and want to sweep under the rug, but it’s too important to be treated like this continuously.
I remember reading a book called “Breaking the Psychological Chains” and as it discussed colorism and self-hate and how these were key elements in the conditioning of blacks in America and everywhere since colonialism, it stated something important in the book that I had never heard before until after the book. I consider it a perverse nursery rhyme and it goes like this:
If you’re light, than you’re right
If you’re brown, than stick around
If you’re black, than get back…. WAY Back!!!
The words are pretty self-explanatory as to what type of skin tone is right and what type is wrong. Sadly, from what I’ve seen too many black kids know this rhyme, word from word. So even at a young age, their innocence and self-worth has been tainted. I have heard of incidents where one kid (light) will tell another kid(light) not to play with one kid because they are dark. That is not a mindset they are born with, it is a mindset that they are taught.
Colorism affects both male and females, but the ones getting the most slack from it are dark-skinned females. I mean what is wrong with being dark-skinned? what is wrong with having skin that is deep in hue? What is wrong with having that skin tone and being a woman? the main question is what is wrong with it?
Some say dark-skin equates with being masculine and light skin equate with being feminine, some say its easier to see the beauty in a light skin person rather than a dark-skinned person, and some make other ignorant excuses. Neither of these are true.
Nothing is wrong with dark-skin, in fact I see more beauty in it; there is beauty in it, there is a strength about it that I can’t put into words. In my eyes dark-skin symbolizes a sort of timeless beauty, one that screams that I am the original Adam or Eve, and no matter what and through all these years, I cannot be tainted.
Colorism hurts and its intricate bond with self-hate seems to expand to every generation. Yet, it is something that should no longer be ignored. We need to stop all the excuses we make for not trying to deal with attacking colorism and the way it hurts dark-skinned women in our community.
I’m tired of hearing “We’ve moved on from that,” “Why are we still talking about this in 2011,” “This is just a ploy by the white man….” and such, we need to realize that we never dealt with it and that is why it keeps popping up. The main excuse I’m tired of hearing is “Everyone has preferences” Yes that is true; however, ask each of those people to reevaluate those “preferences” most of it is tied back to slavery. There is no such thing as “the past is the past” because the past affects the present and the future; consider the past a foundation upon which we build from.
To every dark girl across the world, whether you are in Africa, the Caribbean, America, Europe, Asia, Canada, Latin America, and anywhere else know that you are beautiful, know that you are special, know that your skin tone is not a mistake, know that God doesn’t make mistakes, and know that it’s a struggle to realize your beauty in this corrupted world, but when you do it you will gain an abundance of self-love rather than self hate.
To every parent out there, stop the dark-skin jokes, stop treating one kid than the others because of skin tone, stop bleaching yourself, stop bleaching your kids, monitor what your kids watch, always speak positivity to your kids and their self-esteem, do not place your past hurts on them and do not take out your anger and frustration out on them.
To every black man who has shunned a woman for being too dark, or simply thinks its their preference to want anything close to white, truly evaluate your preferences and your thought patterns, and see that self-hate is more in your subconscious than you’re conscious of.
To every Black person around the globe every morning you wake up make a conscious effort to deprogram yourselves, to shake off your prior teachings of inferiority and to love yourself and your people, do not follow societies standard of beauty because it does not exists.
Another thing black people as a whole need to stop supporting artist that degrade women period, stop rocking to it, stop listening to it, stop calling the radio requesting it, and stop downloading it, stop aiding in your own enslavement and degradement.
P.S. have you seen how good black love looks and sounds.